Thursday, September 27, 2012

Lesson 151. She loves you in her own funny way.

My eldest elf of a sister still makes me hold her hand when we cross the road. We fight on a semi regular basis and butt heads on all things emotional. She's the kind of woman I'd like to grow into.

She's leaving for Durham on Saturday. She's getting on a big ol' plane and leaving the country. She's leaving behind her family, stability, her boyfriend, her job, because she's a brave lass with a heart that has never been enclosed or restricted by relationship nor a sense of safety. I admire her immensely and love her even more for her feeling of freedom and fight against mediocrity.

Like I say, she's still intent on holding my hand when I cross the road. If my elbows are even close to touching down on the table I'll know about it within seconds. And if I make any mildly inappropriate comments I will be immediately shipped back into shape. My sister has always wanted the best for me and although she doesn't show it or say it in such words, I look back on her intricate and mostly irritating instructions with a fondness. I know that she does what she does and says what she says because she loves me, and she's looking out for me.

We had coffee yesterday. It was such a special time. I was reminded of our similarities, mostly the way our heads both go slightly forward when we laugh and the way we over think every situation present in our lives. I suddenly realised just how close I hold Katie to my heart as a sister and a friend. I'm going to miss her a lot, but her leaving has made me realise that the things I battle with her are also the things I love the most. It's a silver lining if ever I saw one.

We all have one of those right. An older family member or friend that puts on the mother goose hat majority of the time. And it's easy to only fight with them instead of recognising what's going on, So don't let it take your big sister skipping the country to make you remember that everyone says I love you in different ways. Whether it's making you hold your hand while you cross the street or sending gushy texts or bringing you flowers when you're ill in bed. She loves you in her own funny way.

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