Thursday, July 12, 2012

Lesson 85. You can be light.

You’re going to have to forgive me over the next few days. I’m currently on family holiday and Internet is scarce- it’s probably a good thing actually. I don’t mind me a few days with less complicated and less frequent interaction with the outside world. It's a slight relief actually.

Last night I had a bit of an episode. I have a sleeping disorder that is actually most commonly found in children, but because I'm a weirdo and I specialise in slightly out of the ordinary problems, I posses this occasionally entertaining but for the most part quite terrifying disorder. I have night terrors, maybe your younger brother or sister could tell you about them. The short of it is, I wake up screaming in a panic and display symptoms similar to those of an anxiety attack. 

Last night was no exception, I awoke in a frenzy and ran out of my room into the lounge. I had a wee weep and watched 23 minutes of Sleepless in Seattle before returning to my bed. I popped the light on in the hall and wedged a shoe between the door and it's frame. This is because after these episodes, I'm generally awfully afraid of the dark. That's right, I'm 18 years old, I live away from home and I'm at University and my knees knock at the thought of a pitch back bedroom. I generally flip a lamp on or sleep with fairy lights to shed a little light on my terror. 

I lay in bed and pondered the way that light works. The slice that streamed through my door and changed everything about the way I saw the world. What if you and I were that? 

We could change the world. That's what. If you and I created a little light, if we loved a little more and shed our self-absorbed skins I genuinely believe that we could change everything about the way people living in darkness see the world. It's not a suggestion or a simple what if this time round, it's a mandate and a burden that we must learn to carry. So many people are scared, lost, lonely. We could change that. Be excited, you can be light. 

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